Weights & Beautiful Things

Oh what a glorious weekend! This was possibly one of the most perfect weekends. On Saturday we got up and went to the donut store. The whole time we were driving Colt kept asking if we would drop him off at his Memaws house. It was super cute. So Mr. Hubs called his mom and she said to drop him off after church and he could stay the night. It doesn't matter how old my baby gets I still get butterflies in my tummy when its time to leave him overnight some where. He always does great and has a blast but I let my nerves get me every time. I got ahead of myself though. Before we dropped him off I had something else to take care of, Saturday was my first time serving at church! It was so much fun. I worked with one of the preschool classes and really enjoyed it. I thought it was pretty funny that I got put in with the three year olds. I told the director I was fine with working with the newborns up to age three. In my mind I was chanting 'newborns, newborns, newborns'. She put me in threes. The funny part was that as soon as  I found out where I'd be working I felt like God was giving me a little nudge and we shared a chuckle together. Ha! I've been asking Him for patience(dealing with my son) for as long as I can remember so when this happened I knew it was God saying, 'Okay you asked for it, I tried showing you on your own but since that didn't work lets do it my way. Here is 22 three year olds. Have fun!!'. He put me exactly where I needed to be. I've been asking for more patience, to be a better Mother, Wife, Daughter, Friend, Sister.... He put me exactly where I needed to be to learn all of this, to become who I want to be. I love my God so much. He not only shows my faults but He teaches me how to overcome them, how to be a better me. I must say, He is pretty amazing!! I had so much fun Saturday night and look forward to this Saturday so I can do it again.


After church and dropping the kid off, my husband decided to take me out for our Valentine Date. We don't usually go on dates. We never have a babysitter and when we do we have no money to go anywhere. We didn't do much but just spent a wonderful evening in each others company. He made me laugh and smile. He  kept his arm around me all night. Its amazing how the simple things can make all the difference. Just the touch of holding hands or a warm embrace can make you feel as if you are on top of the world. We ended our evening eating some breakfast and sharing a waffle at the Waffle House. I had a blast spending the evening with my husband. He makes my heart happy!!

On Sunday I picked up the bestie, one of her sons and our daughter(Ha!) and back to church we went to watch the first service in a new series called 'Weights'. This is going to be another life changing series, here is the first part. You should watch the whole thing but if you are in a hurry and can't watch it now then at least go to 1:00:40 and listen to Jordan Weston and DyAna Bush sing a soul reaching rendition of 'Beautiful Things' by Gungor. I love our worship team, all of them, they are amazing. Have you ever gotten goosebumps listening to a song? There is this connection to God that their singing and music can bring, its indescribable. Its just a beautiful thing that brings smiles and joyous tears, making you feel so close and intimate with someone that is so big. Thank you Jesus!!
 
Weights - Part 1 from Church on the Move on Vimeo.

His Touch

Lately I've been thinking a lot about how you can feel God's love through the embrace of a loved one or even the touch of a stranger. We need that sometimes when the hard times are too much to bare and our lives are filled with sadness. I know that God is there always. He knows the plans He has in store for me and my family and for my friends. I don't know that plan though and when I see people struggling it is so hard for me to understand all of the suffering. I've learned to put all my trust in God. I pray to Him, I ask of Him, I talk to Him, I listen to Him, I receive Him, I love Him. He is with me always and when my heart is breaking and sad, He always knows how to give me a little squeeze and let me know He is still here. 
I've been surrounded by heartache this year. I have a great group of friends. They are my girls, they are my Foxys. Five women. Each one of us has been suffering a great deal this year. One of us is fighting for her life. She has made courageous decisions and sacrifices that few could ever fully understand. She is our fighter and we are her army. We will stand behind her, beside her, and with her through every thing. She is our world. She WILL beat cancer. I don't care what doctors say, I know what God says, He is who I serve and who I trust. Another one of us has been fighting a numerous amount of illnesses off and on. She is in pain more times than not. We have fathers who are gone fighting for our country, fathers who have to work on the road to provide for our families. Financial troubles, emotional issues. Raising babies alone, young and old. There is so much heartache in our lives. I am sad for my friends. 
I don't know his plans for us but I do know great things will come of them. I know that He is there for us and He will show you if you pay attention. I was at the store the other day and it was a hard day emotionally. I was with Colton and he was walking down the toy isle showing me what he wanted. I told him he could get a puzzle(a cheap one). He didn't want that one, he wanted the bigger spiderman puzzle. I had to tell him no and that he could ask Santa for it. Trying to get his mind off of it I showed him a puzzle I liked and told him to tell daddy that mommy wanted it for Christmas. He looked at it and then grabbed the one he wanted and said, "Okay and you tell Daddy I want this one". It was beyond cute. There was an older gentleman and a woman about my age on the same isle. They kept laughing at the things Colt was saying and they passed us several times. When we were at the checkout and I was paying, the man came up beside me grabbed a hold of my shoulder and handed me a bag and said, "Santa wanted your boy to have this. Merry Christmas". Then he walked off. I almost started crying. He had bought the puzzle Colt wanted. It wasn't about the puzzle. It was the touch of a stranger. The touch of God. He showed me His kindness and His love through the giving of another. 
You may call them Secret Santa's but I call them blessings from God. He knew what I needed when I needed it, something so simple as the touch of a stranger. 

An Angel Is Born

One of my really good friends had her baby the other day. I can't even begin to express how much happiness she is bringing me. I will be the first to admit that for awhile I distanced myself from her and didn't rejoice with her as much as I should have. I wasn't doing good with my own situation. I was having a poor me pity party and it saddens me that I wasn't there for my friend 100% of the time. That kills me. She needed me and I wasn't there.
We've talked about things since then and I have explained(no excuses) why I acted as I did and I feel she has forgiven me. She may not know the exact feelings I was having but she understands it, understands me. She knows how much I have been hurting and she has always tried to be there for me. I wish I would of just expressed what was going on and talked to her rather than trying to hide away. I not only hurt myself by doing that but I hurt her...and that hurts me even more.
She has been through a lot and instead of letting things get to her, she learned from them. She grew from them. She continues to grow as a child of God, a wife, a mother, a daughter, a sister and a friend. She is absolutely beautiful from the inside out and I am honored to call her my friend.
For a long time things were foggy for me. I couldn't see straight. I only knew the here and now and couldn't see past my pain and struggles. Then things changed. I changed. I continued going to church and praying. I confessed my sins to God and asked for his forgiveness, I was saved. I really just started believing as a whole with absolutely no doubt in my mind. I have given all of my pain and suffering to God and I've honestly been happy...something I really haven't been in a long time.

I was able to be truly happy for my friend. I was happy for her before but I carried a lot of sadness and grief with it and then one day it was gone. The only thing left was a heart full of love, happiness and real genuine smiles. Going through our hard times together has brought us closer. For that I am thankful. I'm able to be there for her completely now and it brings me such joy. Her daughter brings me great happiness. I feel a connection with her, this precious child. I feel like God has taught me great lessons through her: Hope, Faith and Unconditional Love. I truly am blessed. I have so many amazing friends, it almost doesn't seem fair to the world that I managed to capture all the great ones out there.

Congratulations to my amazing friend and her family.

Photo credit: Brian Moreno Barker (*edited by me)

Clarity

On Mother's Day 2011(well technically it was the day before) I was singing praise and worship at church when I felt God put his arms around me and I felt an embrace I've never had before. I was hurting and at that moment I knew God was telling me to let it all go. To trust Him and let Him carry my pain for me. Its an experience that I hope everyone gets a chance to have. Its indescribable.
For so long all my focus was on my infertility struggles. Its all I could think about. It took control of my life. That night at church, I knew everything was going to be okay. Of course I'm still sad about things but I don't keep it as my focus. There are some days that pass where its not even a blip on my radar.
Gods love is all I need. He has me wrapped so tight in his arms, I know he's never letting go.
It may sound strange but I know God has another child for me. I've dreamed of him. I've held him in my arms. He has the perfect child for me just waiting until its time. There are lessons left for me to learn and I know that. I feel at peace with it now. I know its only a matter of time before I'm ready. I trust God and I know that in His time all the desires of my heart will be fulfilled.

-Review- Love by Calvin Miller

Love: Cultivating Spirit-given Character(a six-week study) by Calvin Miller

I really enjoyed this study guide. I've never really thought about the word Love and how often it is thrown around in today's society. We use the word Love on a daily basis for everything and in this guide it teaches you how God intended Love to be. This book gives you daily reads and personal reflection questions that really make you think. I used the book as a daily devotional and while I really enjoyed it there were some days where I read more than just one days worth as I was left wanting more. It's a great book for a small study group, especially those that have limited time to devote to daily readings.

Love is only one of nine studies in the series on the fruits of the Spirit by Calvin Miller. I look forward to looking into the rest of the series.

I received this book free from BookSneeze.com as part of their book review blogger program in exchange for an honest review whether it be negative or positive. The opinions I have expressed are my own.