With you

I haven't slept much since you left. I haven't been awake much either. I'm not sure if I'm here or there. I don't know what I'm doing or where I'm at. I feel scared and alone. This whirlwind of emotions is just too much for my brain to handle. I feel like I'm on a roller-coaster and I can't get off and I can't get the lap bar to lock into place either. I am barely holding on and at any minute I'm going to go flying off losing myself for ever if I haven't already. 
I keep replaying the past in my mind. Going over memory after memory pausing to remember the facial expressions only you could make. Hearing the sound of your voice in my head. Your scent as I kissed your forehead for the last time. Your laugh. Your hair(& at times, the lack of). Your love and passion for the ones you held dear to your heart. Your strength and determine. I close my eyes and I remember you. I close my eyes and hope you will meet me in my dreams for one last hello.